Insecurity. Shame. Self-Hate. Fear. Depression.
Worthlessness.
It’s suffocating, isn’t it? That feeling
that we’ll never be good enough. That we’re worthless. That life has no hope
for us. Those dark lies whispered into our ears, snuffing out our light . . .
You
will never be worthy of a godly husband. Who would want you? You’re too much
work—too much of a mess.
Stop
being so arrogant! Get your face back in the dirt, girl! As if God values you
and has a future for you!
Your
future is dark. You’ll never get where you want to be. God doesn’t really hear
you. You may as well curl up in the corner and waste away.
You’re
not good enough, because you don’t have a job. Look at all those hard workers
out there! They’re so good. You, however, are pretty much useless to your
family.
Ugh.
You’re so stupid. Why did you say that? Why did you do that? When are you ever
going to get it right, you idiot??
Remember
all those dark and awful things you did in your past? You scum of the
earth. If people really knew who you are, they wouldn’t accept and love you.
Look
at you. You’re fat and ugly. Why would that man want you? He could have so many
better girls!
You’re
a horrible mother. You’re wrecking your own children. Your house is a mess.
You’re tired and depressed every day. You’ll never get things right. You’ll
never do anyone any good.
You
think your gift is writing? Actually, your stories are stupid. You’re wasting
your time. You’re not serving God or others.
You
are so shy, and dumb, and socially awkward. Nobody even likes hanging out with
you. They don’t want to talk to you. They don’t want to sit by you. You annoy
them. Just go away.
The list could go on and on. I’ve
struggled with listening to most of these lies.
When I was about twelve/thirteen years old,
I was convinced that I was fat. I didn’t want to visit my family and friends
out of state; I was certain they wouldn’t like me anymore. I would get
depressed when around girls thinner then me—feeling this irrational shame and
less-than-ness.
Around the same age, I fell into a deep
and dark season of doubting God. I knew,
somewhere in my soul, that He was there; but I was afraid that because of my
doubting, He would send me to hell if I died. And I feared the end of the world
would come before I stopped doubting.
For years, I struggled with tying my worth
to how hard and how much I worked. Around thirteen, I actually
remember thinking that my parents probably didn’t love me that much. Why would
they? I was a stupid, moody teenager who didn’t do much work around the house
when it came down to it. Just some hand-washing dishes a couple times a day.
As I got older and still to this day, I
struggle with ever feeling like enough
for a godly husband. I have health issues, and emotional problems, and deal
with irrational fear and anxiety. Who would want me? I’m nothing special.
Nothing sets me apart. I’m boring, awkward, and dumb.
I feel bad for past mistakes. Sometimes
shame consumes me, and I feel like all my wrongdoings of the past define me.
It’s who I am. I’ll never be able to leave it behind. If people really knew . . .
All this stuff . . . it just gets you
feeling so low you wonder if you can ever rise again. I’m sure you readers can
add your struggles to the list. The dark lies you hear daily.
We, as human beings, struggle and struggle
and struggle with insecurity. And the world tries to give us tips, like:
- Just
be you!
- Have
confidence in yourself!
- Look
in the mirror and say, “I love you. You are beautiful.”
- You
rock just the way you are!
- Shake it off!!
And some of this stuff has some merit. (Most of it sounds silly in the light of our monstrous burden of insecurity). But while it can have us
soaring high for a few days, it never seems to keep us on the top of the
mountains; as the world also tells us:
- Skinny
is beautiful. Don’t you see the models? They have thigh gaps, tiny waists, and
long, thin legs. You need to be that way, and here’s how you can do it.
- Stop
being so meek and modest. You must be sexy, brash, and bold if you ever want love.
- You
don’t go to college? Don’t have a job? No boyfriend? Excuse me, child? You’re a
messed up oddity.
- What??
You’ve never been kissed? Don’t believe in having an intimate man and woman
relationship until marriage? What is your problem? You’re definitely never
going to get the beautiful marriage you think you will. You’ll probably end up
an old maid.
And yeah. We fall back in the same old
insecurity. Because we’re “too fat”, or we’re “too thin”. Or we’re different—we
stand up for purity and modesty and godliness, and people think we’re stupid.
Or we see all the perfectly clean houses and happy, loving mother-children
relationships of our friends on Facebook, and feel like a failure. Or we have
high standards for romantic relationships, and feel worthless because we’re not
dating yet—nobody’s even asked.
And everybody tells us, “Yeah right. In
your dreams. You’ll just never get it. You gotta be better. You’ll never be
good enough.”
“You. Will. Never. Measure. Up.”
Suffocating.
And then we look in the mirror and try to
tell ourselves, “I love you. You’re beautiful. You can do it.”?
Forget it!!!
Who believes that in the midst of the
world’s nasty taunts and the Enemy’s even uglier lies that bombard us?
Are you tired of trying to believe all on
your own? I am certainly am. So if you are, then join me. We need a new plan of
confidence and finding our worth.
It starts with: Look to your Creator and
His Word.
(All scripture taken from the ESV version. Large lettering my doing.)
God made you.
26 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds
of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every
creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”
27 So God created man in his own image,
in
the image of God he created him;
male
and female he created them.
28 And God blessed them. And
God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and
have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and
over every living thing that moves on the earth.” 29 And God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed
that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food. 30 And to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and
to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life,
I have given every green plant for food.” And it was so.31 And
God saw everything
that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. Genesis 1:26-31
13 For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother's
womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in
secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them. Psalm 139:13:16
19 Or do
you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you
have from God? You
are not your own, 20 for you were
bought with a price. So
glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians
6:19-20
The Almighty God
created you. He crafted you and your inmost parts. He designed your talents,
your desires, your dreams, you future. He made YOU a temple of the Holy Spirit.
Guys, this is
huge! Imagine an unimaginable, holy, high Being taking dust gently into his
big, loving hands, and precisely and purposefully forming YOU.
Readers, God made you.
God
saved you.
You make known to me the
path of life;
in
your presence there is fullness of joy;
at
your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm
16:11
13 He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred
us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, Colossians 1:13
16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that
whoever believes in him should not perish
but have eternal life. John 3:16
The Creator
of the Universe, the one true God, the mightiest and holiest Being . . . He
saved you. God sent His ONLY, BELOVED Son to die for you. He was
bruised, and beaten, and killed so that YOU MIGHT HAVE LIFE. And not just life,
but abundant life! And eternity!
The Bible
says the greatest love is laying down your life for someone else. Wouldn’t you
agree?? Well, Jesus Christ, the Son of God, did that for you.
Readers, God saved you.
God
does not condemn You.
Those who look to him are radiant,
and
their faces shall never be ashamed. Psalm
34:5
Sometimes, what makes us insecure, is the shame of past sins. The guilt of failure. The fear of never being good enough. But the truth is, you don't have to be ashamed. Your wrongdoings of the past, are gone. Wiped away. You are free!!
36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. John 18:36
Furthermore, there's now no more condemnation. No one can point a finger at you and say, "Well, she did this that one time . . ." No.
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
God is not a stern taskmaker, or a cruel father, or a condemning judge; waiting for you to mess up so He can strike you. No! He loves His creations! He desire that they be saved and cleansed and filled with joy and hope in Him!
14 So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of
these little ones should perish. Matthew
18:14
34 O
Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills
the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing! Luke 13:34
Now the tax collectors and sinners
were all drawing near to hear him. 2 And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, “This man receives sinners and
eats with them.”
3 So he told them this parable: 4 “What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them,
does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost,
until he finds it? 5 And
when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. Luke 15:1-5
Do you still carry the sins of your past, as a
secret burden? Does it tie you up in knots of shame and insecurity? Do you feel like a failure? Do you think God is angry in heaven, shaking his finger at you because you just can't get it right? Read the
above verses, my dear!! Those who look to God, their faces are radiant!! They
are not ashamed! If you have simply accepted the gift, you are forgiven, you
are free, you are shameless; there is NO condemnation for you. God is not waiting to shame you, He is waiting to gather you up in His arms and help you!
And those past sins, they are no more.
Readers, God does not condemn you.
God
sees you.
13 So she
called the name of the Lord who spoke to her, “You are a God of
seeing,” for she said, “Truly
here I have seen him who looks after me.” Genesis
16:13
Oftentimes, we acknowledge that God created us, we accept His gift of eternal life. But we don't actually feel like He values us. We feel ashamed or arrogant to claim God's love & care. I mean, me? I'm just a little nobody in the grand scheme of things. God allowed me to be born, but now leaves me to muddle through life on my own. Nothing could be further from the truth!! Here the Truth, dear readers:
11 He will tend his flock like a shepherd;
he will gather the lambs in his arms;
he will carry them in his bosom,
and gently lead those that are with young. Isaiah 40:11
1 O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me. Psalm 139:1-5
27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. John 10:27-28
27 The eternal God is your dwelling place,
and underneath are the everlasting arms. Deuteronomy 33:27
16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, Romans 8:16
We are His children. He is our shepherd! He lovingly carries us close to His heart. He knows us. Our needs. Our pain. Our desires. Our thoughts. Our dreams. Our gifts. Our future.
And not only does God know us. He cares about us. Every detail. Even little things that we think God wouldn't notice or be bothered with. You are never alone. Jesus saw the needs and hurts of those around them; He saw their hearts and He cared.
13 And when the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her and said to her, “Do not weep.” Luke 7:13
17 The Lord your God is in your midst,
a mighty one who will save;
he will rejoice over you with gladness;
he will quiet you by his love;he will exult over you with loud singing. Zephaniah 3:17
“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. John 14:1
7 casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7
12 Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12
When we stray, He woos us back. When we ask, even in our dirtiest, blackest form, He saves us. He cares about our needs, He cares about us; and He will not allow anything to take us from Him.
42 And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”43 And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” Luke 23:42-43
14 “Therefore, behold, I will allure her,
and bring her into the wilderness,
and speak tenderly to her.
15 And there I will give her her vineyards
and make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.
And there she shall answer as in the days of her youth,
as at the time when she came out of
the land of Egypt. Hosea 2:14-15
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation,
or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written,
“For your sake we are being killed all the
day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be
slaughtered.”
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers,
nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be
able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:35-39
18 The
Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into his heavenly
kingdom. To him be the glory
forever and ever. Amen. 2 Timothy 4:18
You are of much value to God. In your distress, your fear, your sorrow, your insecurity, your anxiety, your hopelessness, your pain, He is there.
Readers, God sees you.
God
has a plan for you.
But now thus
says the Lord,
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
“Fear not, for I have redeemed
you;
I have called you by name, you are
mine. Isaiah 43:1
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew
you,
and before you were born I consecrated you; Jeremiah 1:5
18 having
the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the
hope to which he has called you, what are the
riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19 and what is the
immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the
working of his
great might 20 that
he worked in Christ when
he raised him from the dead and seated
him at his right hand in
the heavenly places, 21 far
above all
rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named,
not only in this
age but also in the one to come. Ephesians
1:18-21
10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10
For I want
you to know how
great a struggle I have for you and for those at Laodicea
and for all who have not seen me face to face, 2 that their
hearts may be encouraged, being knit
together in love, to reach all the riches of full assurance of understanding
and the knowledge of God's
mystery, which is Christ, 3 in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.
Colossians 2:1-3
Therefore,
since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside
every weight, and sin
which clings so closely, and let us
run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking to Jesus, Hebrews
12:2
9 But
you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that
you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. 1 Peter 2:9
Look to Jesus! Know there is hope, and purpose, and destiny for you! God chose you! He has a future for you! He has a specific plan for your life; you have a purpose on this earth. You are needed. Your gifts and talents are meant to be used. God has called you to abundant life, hope and joy, and eternity!
Readers, God has a plan for you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So . . . after all that . . . (which was really quite beautiful, don't you agree? The Bible never fails to surprise me, amaze me, and touch deep into my soul); what is the conclusion? How does that solve the issues of our painful insecurity?
If God made you. Saved you. Does not condemn you. Sees you. Has a plan for you . . .
That means you are worthy. Valued. Forgiven. Cherished. New. You are royalty. You have great hope. You have an incredible inheritance.
Because of Christ. Because of this amazing Father God who looked down and said, "I want to save my children, because I love them". We are enough because Jesus loves us!
If I throw off the world's sneers and Satan's condemnation, and look up into the glorious face of Jesus, I see that I am beautiful (He created me in His image), I am valued (He chose to save my weak, doubting soul), I am forgiven and clean (He does not condemn me), I am cherished (He sees me), I am royalty, I have hope (He has plan for me; on earth and in eternity).
If I look to the world or to myself, I will never be secure. I will never be confident. I will never be good enough. I will never be clean. I will never be hopeful.
Because it's all about Jesus! It's all about my loving Father! It's not about me. And that is perfect. Because when I stop looking at myself, and start looking at Him, all I see is His love.
And I'm convinced, somehow, deep down, that I am beautiful, secure, loved, strong, HIS.
And I see that others are too. And suddenly, I want to tell the world to stop looking for self-confidence and start looking for Jesus! Because I have found this incredible security, and I want you, my dear reader, to find it too! *Big hugs* <3
Now
all I have to say to you is . . . 19 Now set your mind and heart to seek the Lord your
God. 1 Chronicles 22:19
(All pictures found on Pinterest)
